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Thanks Ziggy <3
In the ignorance of my youth, I mistakenly believed that I could become strong by desensitizing myself to vulgarity and violence. But in actuality, I was just steadily disconnecting myself from everything beautiful and loving. I am genuinely overjoyed that you've found freedom from what might have been a similar ordeal. [1of4]
Your studies also sound interesting. From what I understand, "dialectical materialism" is simply knowledge gained by interacting directly with one's environment. The interchange that is experienced is a process of dialectic. It tempers the speculation and "solipsism" that has a tendency to occur within some "metaphysical idealism". [2of4]
The type of "phenomenlogy" which asks, "How does the information from my senses connect to the phenomena of Nature?" can sometimes accomplish something similar. A particularly clear example of that is Goethe's work (e.g.: Theory of Colors). [3of4]
After studying it, Steiner then took that method in interesting "metaphysical" directions (e.g.: The Philosophy of Freedom). If you like these sorts of philosophical excursions into the intersection of mind and matter, you might also get a kick out of Wilber's AQAL Model...May your healing be deep, and your peace lasting. Take care. [4of4]