hey does anyone ever do things twice or even more just to make sure. it's not a memory thing. it's like. i'll write/edit. save it. and then save it again. to make sure it worked. even though i see that it did. and then a moment passes and i'll get distracted and then i'll save it again to make sure it's extra saved. even though i didn't exactly forget i just saved it a second ago
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had a nightmare last night one of my mother's friends was chasing me through a house that wasn't the one i live in, shouting my [deadname] over and over swearing she wanted to help me, but when i said not to call me that & i needed time to myself she didn't listen. she kept chasing me, and when i tried hiding in a closet, she pried the fucking door open, still shouting. i didn't have a good grip on the door
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benny1548132
19 hours ago
and my fingernails were breaking and my fingers hurt like shit but that just made me angrier, and the angrier i got the less seriously she took me, and in not a long time at all, she got the door open. i don't remember anything after that. i guess i woke up. it was frankly a gross nightmare to have because it's so fucking accurate. she wouldn't literally chase me because she's too old lol but the rest is very her
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thank you to virtually-isolated, pirahxcx, onlytrichromatic, and thecountrybat for directly or indirectly helping me figure out something with iframes. my new index looks great, i think, and my opinion is the only one that matters. i am very grateful
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Disco Elysium really is a great game -- of my favorites -- but the more time you spend trying build it up in your mind as the great*est* or spend around people who do, the worse it gets. it's a game about a cop. it's pretty not awful politically despite that, and it's really funny. but it's not the work of God
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USA is evil
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benny1548132
4 days ago
and so are you ngl and so am i. anyone worrying about a future nuclear war or the future of amerikkka or its citizens than for the 83+ iranians that were murdered today is evil. does anyone want to take me by the hand and we can work together to be less evil or are you all just going to chalk this up to schizoposting
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benny1548132
4 days ago
and it didn't even start today, we've been starving people over there with sanctions for years
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benny1548132
4 days ago
i know i'm an asshole to remind everyone that the USA is evil & has always been, but i'll be that asshole. i know i may not have the right to be because it's not my country being bombed, but i'm so fucking pissed off
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someones-insane
4 days ago
i'm pissed off at the news as well. the USA is incredibly stupid, vile, and other unkind words that i know better than to say here. youd have to be on some columbian speedball to think this makes anybody happier
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i wish there was a way i could tune into cable (TV) occasionally without having to pay for it or connect some kind of account. just so i could see what people who watch cable are watching these days
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oscarspage
6 days ago
mostly ED pills, hair loss treatments, and gambling ads. TV is awful the rare times I catch it
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i love watching Windows Powershell work. i feel like a genius hacker when in fact i am just updating a program in a very simple way lmfao. but how it looks and functions does bring me great joy. i am almost sexually attracted to watching it
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will installing grapheneOS onto my new (used) phone fuck up my computer?
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benny1548132
1 week ago
https://grapheneos.org/install/web i'm reading this and believe it or not i'm stupid enough to be a little lost on which steps i specifically need to follow, and what will happen to the computer i'm using to install grapheneOS.
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benny1548132
1 week ago
i'd follow all the steps, but the phone i'm getting comes unlocked, so i don't think i need to do that part.
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i hate money -- i mean, i hate needing money, i hate capitalism -- but i love cash. the feel & smell of it. if there was a cologne that made me smell like cash i'd wear that shit 24/7
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i had to literally beg my parents for extra time on my computer tonight, to write. and as i did i felt so small & infantile & whiny
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or am i a new type of crazy or i have brain damage or sumthn
i've had software claim to save things and then it turned out it just printed the "saved" message without saving anything, so yeah depending on the program i might save something 3 or 4 times just to make sure.
okay thank fuck it's not that weird
it does feel like a bit of mental pressure though. like idk. maybe i'm just stressed out by other things rn. i really really think my blog especially is super important so it kinda upsets me each time to imagine it gone or even if a typo isn't fixed. it would be not good to go on hiatus rn given that it's one of the only good things in my life, but i do have to remember i can do whatever i want with my website
and that it's literally fine if it takes a while to edit something and i can be slow & intentional about that on purpose. because i often write straight in the editor but then i do like to back it up to a document on my computer so it's like. save. copy paste. save that version. wait. i want to add something. do it again. and again. wait. typo. wait. the tenses don't match. wait. sigh. fuck
i have to remember that i literally can do whatever i want!! and that i am not doing this for money or grades. i don't have to strangle myself to death about this
Omg i'm pre sure like half my saves are exactly that lol
I save like 10 times bro
people that press save just once have the brain damage, not the other way around.