im sorry :( stay strong

i will try

Things will improve.

the only Jewish people i know personally are like this. for a while i would get scared or disappointed meeting Jewish people because i would immediately assume Zionism. i'm ashamed of this too. i'm just so scared and tired of everyone -- Jewish, Christian, atheistic -- being so uncaring & lying so deeply about what they believe. i thought believing in God meant love. i thought it was about love & loving people

religion has more to do with p diddy reading the bible in a courtroom than anyone would like to admit

god you guys it's so weird to have people you love and hate at the same exact time. like you see them and you enjoy it in the moment but you just keep noticing little things. and it's little things, mostly political in nature. things that poke at your principles or values. they say they have the same principles and values, but they don't. you can't prove they don't. yet. you feel crazy

who the fuck am i kidding. this is what it's like when it's just me and my parents, too. but i guess it's notable and more painful now because these people are supposed to be my friends, they say they are my friends, they say they love me, they say it's authoritarian the way my mother acts, and they don't do shit about it, and they love her, too, and they laugh with her, and talk with her, and they gave her gifts,

you might think that i'm some mentally ill bastard or with luck you think it's just that my family is shitty & abusive, but no, it's neither, or perhaps it's all three including this last option; the other night everyone else in the room was making fun of a disabled person none of them know for being unable to shower, and today, my friend told me she thinks she'd make a good occupational therapist for disabled kids

okay so christmas morning happened and i got some stuff i didn't want and some stuff i did (because i directly asked for it, and felt guilty) and then i felt sick and had to shit a bunch and then i spent an hour working on an issue with my CD player and now somehow the day is over

how the fuck is it already basically dinner time. fuckkkkk

cum on man, soften up and stop acting so hard

yeah but. this isn't a thought i had unprovoked, this is something my mother said to me last night

yeah, dude, it mattered. but so does putting one foot in front of the other. i just gotta keep putting one foot in front of the other

I understand the sentiment. The systematic creation of Unicursal Mazes can be frustrating due to its pace but slow and steady progress always yields results in the end.

well, except for that last part. but i would get incredible memes and posts about their plushies and their hobbies and useful information about medication and methods for recovery, anti-psych stuff, too, and we'd play Ponytown and different drawing games together. we also watched Nosferatu together

too bad a few revealed themselves to be Zionists, and the rest were / are...apparently glued to Discord so strongly it's comparable to a human fly trap