WHALEFALL

benny1548132.neocities.org

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saw what i think was a joke at disabled people's expense on here. blocked the guy, mostly moving on. i hate talking about this shit because i always feel like a chronically online whiner for it. maybe i am. but i feel crushed. it just fucking sucks
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benny1548132's avatar benny1548132 20 hours ago

i am not ashamed to admit that i am a sensitive guy and sensitivity is fucking awesome. being cold and entirely unserious and ironypoisoned is cold and dull and mindnumbing. i've tried it. i prefer hurting. because i prefer caring

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heart143's avatar heart143 18 hours ago

yes! emotional management is a skill and they hate to see us winning

wraithcastle's avatar wraithcastle 11 hours ago

there has been a very conscious effort by the right over the past ....forever... to frame people with empathy as whiny and ineffectual, and frame genuine concerns as minor complaints. not that you need my permission but i encourage you to continue being sensitive

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benny1548132's avatar benny1548132 7 hours ago

i don't know if you can call it empathy if you're feeling what you're feeling on your own behalf (i am disabled, after all) as much as the others'. maybe it's just, idek, part of me or what i do or us or what we do

MMY EYES (totally worth it) (my eyes?? yours now)
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yuor photos capture such emotion
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benny1548132's avatar benny1548132 2 days ago

i read this last night after i said i was gonna sleep -- to be fair, it was like the last thing i saw before lights out -- and it almost brought tears to my eyes. wtf. thank you

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omg hi, i'm also 24, an immigrant (2nd or 3rd generation tho, depending??), and i also love urbex. your website fucking rocks. bedtime now but i'll add your button tomorrow
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pripyatprincess's avatar pripyatprincess 2 days ago

we are friends now ok??? ;D

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benny1548132's avatar benny1548132 2 days ago

okay yay haha

Hi. I hope you make it out. I got out by the skin of my teeth. Even addressing your situation while you are in it is exceedingly painful, like pulling yourself up by your bootstraps. The single best thing I can offer is to emotionally shut down as much as possible around your abusers. Further, avoid dependence: use public transit, get whatever employment you can, so forth. Eat as good as possible.
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kaa's avatar kaa 3 days ago

Provide me a private contact, we can talk. My email address is accessible via the top '@' of my site's index.

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benny1548132's avatar benny1548132 2 days ago

i'm already pretty shut down around them, but i will say i won't be pulling myself up by my bootstraps. i'm actually trying to learn that it's okay to need help, because i do need help.

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benny1548132's avatar benny1548132 2 days ago

i do want to talk, though. i'll email you

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i love your space bait
these past few days with my mother have been really bad and confusing
bennyyyyy thanks for stopping by. looking forward to the frankenphone results
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benny1548132's avatar benny1548132 6 days ago

thank you, thank you!! hopefully something will happen. eventually

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sent $10 to https://lopster.neocities.org/HELPME because even though i also have shitty parents & a shitty life, they need it more than i do right now. (insert that joke about mutual aid being the same poor people trading the same five bucks around) praxis
benny1548132's avatar benny1548132 1 week ago

no pressure, i guess. even sending a dollar would be better than nothing, and if you have nothing to send, you're okay

being chronically ill and boycotting discord and most social media means i'm very, very lonely
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