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I proclaim, the site exists, the site exists in a new, incomplete-complete raw form
thank you so much for posting this because i really needed the reminder. i'm taking a step back from some creative projects i have been working on for a while which means i have to actually start something new and i keep putting it off and trying to find "inspiration" first when i know i literally just need to start.
on minimalist sites and overhauling: although unintentional and definitely not always the case, minimalist aesthetics have slowly become synonymous with conservatism. i totally relate to the fear of being seen too. of course it's your site and you're free to do what you want with it, but imo your variety of writing pages and hobbies really give it character!
@limivars thank you so much! That means a lot. I think I know what you mean regarding minimalist aesthetics, and Iβm not sure changing the site would even make me feel better lol. Just not sure how to resolve this pressure (tightness, stress, fear) of existing on the internet.
I donβt want to make my sight dimmer, but I guess sometimes I feel too loud and out there anyway, lol. I donβt know what to make of anything.
truly a lifelong lesson, learning to take up space in the world (i also wanna hide from the world at times - comes in ebb and flow really)
i understand completely about being left behind. occasionally i see someone i used to go to high school with around town, being a functional human being, while i'm just... doing whatever the hell it is i do. for that reason, i actually hate august.
you say you feel off path but i wonder in what way-- like if your life was "on path," what would that look like? (just a thought /srs, even though i often use that phrase as a joke) because i m yself often find myself thinking "this is wrong" without knowing what i think is right
@niicespiice I'm mostly alluding to the "path" that everyone is told is "right." be cishet, fall in line, do high school > college > career start > marriage > house > kids etc. which is not even the path I want, but that means my path is undefined. I'm just kind of wandering right now, and I think the wandering itself feels wrong, personally and societally
I understand this feeling completely honestly... as someone whos going to college and has career plans, it still feels like its not the "right path" . its compounded by physical and mental disability and just. life. i think it gets easier as you get older, maybe. My moms 47 and she seems much happier than she did even when she was 30, and she didnt pick the "right" path either. so maybe theres hope?
I manually duplicate every time :) I'm not even sure how I'd go about automating/it's not something I've even thought about
I relate a lot to your blog post, it's crazy how listlessness and longing for change can make us think the most extreme things are a good idea. Wrestling those dangerous thoughts into submission is so exhausting, too, but I'm inspired by how deeply you think about it all. I hope you feel better soon, and that some positive change finds its way into your life that helps you forget what this chapter felt like.
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My favorite anime of all time is Oniisama e/Dear Brother!! I also love Princess Tutu, the Fruits Basket reboot, Princess Jellyfish, Houseki no Kuni, and Keep Your Hands Off Eizouken :D
my favs include mp100, paranoia agent, angel's egg, revolutionary girl utena, cybercity odeo 808, maison ikkoku, vinland saga, tatami galaxy, mushishi, tokyo godfathers, memories, dungeon meshi, and serial experiments lain
when it comes to manga, i also remember liking dorohedoro, golden kamuy, & vagabond a lot. but warning for vagabond: there's some dark stuff in it and you might have to look up some content warnings
oh i forgot yokohama shopping log
i'm not much of an anime watcher but i looove dungeon meshi!! even if it only has one season
Dungeon meshi is so yummy yummy ππππ
Rose of Versailles (with recommendation to be patient and at least try get past the first 10 episodes, it's a slow burn), Oniisama e is by the same author and I would recommend it too. Land of the Lustrous is good
Oh and I forgot to mention Fullmetal Alchemist (2003 version - sorry Brotherhood fans)
all time favorite is 100% ouran highschool host club. absolute peak. for a more recent release, the apothecary diaries is Really really good. also: trigun stampede + promare ^^*
I'm basic, but i love Black Butler and Yuri on Ice. ALSO, You Are Umasou is very cute and underrated.
If you want a really good movie to watch I am a huge fan of Vampire Hunter D Bloodlust, but as for shows I gotta say Inuyasha and Yu Yu Hakusho are classics for a reason. Honestly same with OG Dragon Ball and Dragon Ball Z (I'd look up a filler list tho, lol). Hunter x Hunter (1999) is really beautiful as well ^-^
mygo and its sequel ave mujica, i need to watch more anime but bandori has been something i'm attached to for a long time and is one of the few anime that isn't grotuetously sexual
Assassination Classroom was pretty good.