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ryomakesthings
1 year ago
love the format, feels like somewhat of a hero's journey - the process of unravelling and rebuilding one's identity. Thank you for sharing, and congrats on your first prompt!
museariadne
1 year ago
thank you sm for joining !! this is such a beautiful piece (i v much agree & love that i can feel a journey through it). can't wait to see your future entries :]
ryomakesthings
1 year ago
it's incredible how much soul you can condense in shorter pieces, your last entry is very bittersweet. also in love with last week's prompt, came out really well!
percevalprintpress
1 year ago
@ryomakesthings Thank you!! Most of my poems start out longer and I cut them down in editing but this is also me being obsessive about making every word have a meaning
mism4tchedsocks
1 year ago
"i'd wash my hands but the blood keeps coming" yoooo. love this imagery!!
ryomakesthings
1 year ago
I actually really like how short it is, it's concise! also like the use of biblical references when describing the corporeal and the mundane, though that is something I personally always find beautiful
manyface
1 year ago
ohhhh i love your writing and the imagery running through it!!! it's so potent and raw!
ryomakesthings
1 year ago
I really like the contrast between the reverent tone of the piece and the visceral imagery scattered throughout, I think it works really well!
ryomakesthings
1 year ago
I really like the idea of evolution as a conscious progress, as something you can shape and choose for yourself. powerful stuff, thank you for sharing!
soulbox
1 year ago
Thank you for sharing this. I feel the same, sometimes I feel like I was born wrong. I hope you're able to live your life how you want to. ^^
tehuan
1 year ago
oh this is such a wonderful piece! i love the changes in focus and how you used something usually man-made in contrast with the idea of nature and its' selections, ebbs & flow. thank you for sharing :] and there's no wrong way to answer a prompt. it's an inspiration, not a test. i'm glad you got something from it π
owlroost
1 year ago
Agreed that there is no wrong way to answer a prompt! I love the font choice, by the way. It's pleasing AND easy to read.
soulbox
1 year ago
@tehuan Thank you! I love the questions and I understand that they're super abstract but sometimes my brain feels like it has a legit hard time understanding them so I feel as though I'm doing something wrong still lol. The questions get me thinking, regardless!
soulbox
1 year ago
@owlroost Thank you! The font is called Simple Plan. Easy to read is what I was looking for so I'm glad it's a success. ^^
ryomakesthings
1 year ago
I love the parallel between human creation and human existence - evolution as a certain inevitable cyclicality. concise yet beautiful!
ryomakesthings
1 year ago
such impressive writing, very picturesque and well-crafted yet speaking to a very raw inner world. both a joy to read!
grlrot
1 year ago
oh i LOVE this, the last stanza especially, and the use of slashes to make it keep going is so awesome...
owlroost
1 year ago
That second stanza... that Resonated. May those that come after have bread pudding and tangerines (good taste).
ryomakesthings
1 year ago
I love the bittersweet feeling of this poem - especially the wall of slashes at the end, the empty space is very powerful!
tehuan
1 year ago
omg yay !! excited to have u :]] would you mind making ur page designated as /muse instead of /writing ? also totally okay to like... put /muse pages under /writing categories & stuff. just trying to maintain continuity as much as possible ! regardless, will add u soon !
ryomakesthings
1 year ago
love the use of the Shakespearean sonnet and iambic pentameter, you always build such beautiful imagery in your poems. especially like the recurring contrast between the spiritual and carnal planes!
owlroost
1 year ago
That first line? Brilliant. Got my attention immediately because of the imagery of it. The first lines for each stanza, really, but especially the very first one.
manyface
1 year ago
@ryo Thank you so much! I appreciate this. I actually read a lot of Baudelaire poems from The Flowers of Evil because @melxncholyman has a page dedicated to them, so this was sort of a response to what I read. Although, I am all about carnal spirituality! - Efir
manyface
1 year ago
@owlroost Thank you so much. I really wanted to bring the image of trace elements of decaying bodies being a part of living plants. - Efir
manyface
1 year ago
this is a really cool interpretation of the prompt!!! well done, i liked reading it a lot!!
manyface
1 year ago
oh omg i just saw the softness prompt... it's so lovely!!! you did an amazing job!! i really feel that about my sister!
ryomakesthings
1 year ago
there is so much emotional vulnerability and openness in your work - I especially like how you used the comic format in the prompt from a few weeks ago!
ryomakesthings
1 year ago
this is such a sweet poem, there is almost a kind of nostalgia in it. also love how compact it is, I think the length works really well!
ryomakesthings
1 year ago
I really like the choice of formatting it as a prayer, it's a real bittersweet poem in that sense - how it speaks to a certain hope within the desperation and grief. great job!
manyface
1 year ago
this is extremely beautiful, i love it so much. pj strikes once again with poetry that speaks to my soul - j
ryomakesthings
1 year ago
I love how you interpreted the prompt - it's such a raw feeling that you're describing. really powerful piece!
manyface
1 year ago
i like this a lot!!! it's very powerful and visceral and i enjoy that about poetry in general, so well done :D - j
vagueshape
1 year ago
ooo i love how you phrased this, it's simple but evocative. "everything of the world, and nothing of myself" is such a good line.
caesthoffe
1 year ago
love love LOVE the structure, repetition is one of my favorite poettic devices !!!
manyface
1 year ago
this is an excellent poem, it's really punchy and gets the message across beautifully without being too forceful... well done!!
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lovely !! changed it just now :]
perfect, thanks!