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please seek help. you did not know lindy and lindy's story is not something for you to idolize and romanticize. she was a real person with a family, friends and loved ones, and you are too. ending your life is not the answer.
We miss her, too! Lindy died by suicide on 4/20/23, she was 25! I am her mom using her phone and loved her so much. We will never recover from this tragic event. Please get help if you're dealing with mental issues. Take care and be well ❤️
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i probably simply won't follow sites with dni/byf whether they apply to me or not
Could you elaborate on what point folks are missing? I would love to better understand your thoughts on this as I have an DNI for minors for my site as do several other sites I follow regardless of whether or not they contain NSFW content.
Personally, I think of asking minors not to interact with/view your site (because of adult content/topics or otherwise) as a totally different thing from DNIs related to discourse/fandom/etc. ( ̄ω ̄)
I never understood DNIs in general -- I don't want someone to interact with me, I just block them to start with. You don't leave the ball in someone you believe is a dishonest player's court, ffs.
("Minors, this is intended for adults, skedaddle now" doesn't count as a DNI, imho -- more of a content warning/self-covering? Because...minors gonna look at stuff they shouldn't anyway, but they can't say I didn't warn 'em if I state it outright.)
Agree, obviously with the solitary exception of the pretty common "no minors please".
@lostletters they're more usable in a social media setting where folks can share/directly comment on your content, hence the "interact" part, where that's not typically something that happens on static site hosts. nc does technically have the tl feature, but that's limited to messages posted and updates, not several individual posts with content that may be triggering to users
@lostletters i'd say what you're doing is more of a content warning over a dni. you're watning of others of what your site may contain out of respect for their safety, and allowing others to curate their own experience by deciding to engage with you, whereas a dni is typically someone asking folks to curate their experience for them by not exposing them to something for their comfort
@lazer-bunny i agree!
@september lol yeah, i'd say that's a fair way to curate your experience and why you don't get it - most ppl with dni expect others to curate for them, meanwhile you're curating yourself. i agree that content warnings aren't the same thing and are helpful
if folks want a little more context on why this Bugs me: rather than to actually set boundaries (which are pretty much impossible on a platform like neocities and other static site hosts, especially if you have third party means of contact set up, unless you have 0 means of contact such as a private tl/no cbox or guestbook/links to other sites you're on) bfy/dni are more about clout
a public way to say where you stand on something, and shame others. also a way to express you expect others to curate your experience for you over curating your own. it's also a very bad idea in general to make a handy dandy list of things that bother you to inform strangers on the internet of what exactly they can effectively harass you with should they choose
you also can't count on others to be respectful of those attempts at boundaries, nor can you actually prove those boundaries were crossed. ex. "_ dni" if their site isn't about that how do you even know they're one of the groups you don't want to engage? what does it matter if they're just looking at your site? shaming a stranger for something possibly arbitrary who might not have even cared to reach out at all lol
that said, if i see them i do try to be respectful of them, so i won't follow or link to folks with them just in case, whether they apply to me personally or not
Thanks for elaborating. I really hadn’t considered this much, so I appreciate your further explanation and thoughts!