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soulbox
2 years ago
I understand being surrounded by people who aren't helpful to your cause. I understand blacking out too but I'm dissociative. I hope you're able to give yourself a break, even if just for a little bit. Sometimes you gotta step back from it all and that it's totally okay to do so.
commemorative-ghosts
2 years ago
I empathise with the feeling of cruelty. It can be a shell one falls into as protection. Perhaps that is the shadow around you.
michaelmas
2 years ago
Here's to better days, Blue ♡ I don't want to overstep anything here, so feel more than free to ignore or delete this, but I think rather than cruelty, that feeling you're speaking of may be jadedness & that is only natural & you are not to blame for that. I hope your pain eases soon.
velvetblue
2 years ago
no worries, you aren't overstepping anything. i guess i am pretty jaded, tbh. its a little reassuring knowing thats it not anything strange, though. thanks for the kind words, i think i just need to slow down a little
jaggiescrapper
2 years ago
what you need is to re-focus yourself. couple of matches in a good ol' fighting games may help you slow down
michaelmas
2 years ago
Exactly! I get the same way & need to... I don't know, kind of go back to myself. I think rest & slowing down will do you good (o˘◡˘o)
michaelmas
2 years ago
For what it's worth, I get where you're coming from. I think a lot of trouble comes from when I feel unjustified in my emotions, which then turn the negative emotions inward as a way to blame myself. I try to remind myself that I don't need enough reason to feel things, that my feelings are my own & I can feel anything I want. Hoping you feel better soon.
velvetblue
2 years ago
yeah, i get that. i think its just a lot of things getting to me, maybe. at the end of the day, i still feel what i feel, and i think thats okay. thanks for the advice and the kind words!
vanillamoth
2 years ago
I'm sorry you feel that way and it's so nice that you have so much insight over self-destructive tendencies. Hope you can find a healthy way to express your feelings and cope, at least while you can't get away from people who abuse you.
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Hobbies when liked enough become work in the end anyways. It just happens that the work's more enjoyable than regular work. Either way, one can't really work when their heart isn't in it. Resting's just as important as work, so be good at that also.