Neocities.org
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not me cryin in the 32 bit cafe discord bc im finally able to put into words why i have been avoiding this website and creating. ever since covid, i don't feel like my brain works the same way anymore. either that, or just as i'm nearing 40 (lol im 36) technology and i don't get along. i was never someone who could strongly code from hand myself, but i could read a template and edit and mess around. (1/?)
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but these days i struggle to even understand what i am reading within my own code here on my website, let alone the newer templates that i want to mess around with. i also felt that i needed a website that worked on a mobile device if i wanted to share it with anyone outside of this community. and i struggled with doing that. i already felt that i struggled bc i use a giant monitor compared to average. (2/?)
im also really bad with words so please DONT take this the wrong way, but i have found the communities (here and the various discords) to be intimidating to me. everyone is so very talented and has such big visions and plans for the internets future and im just... trying to catch a vibe. idk. it was easy to get in my own head and compare myself to others. (3/?)
so with everything kind of just piling up in my brain, i just stopped creating and i hid. but social media sucks and i would like to have my own space again. i have a template im working with ( from ribozone) but my progress on it has been kind of slow bc i dont understand. i also need to figure out if im going to edit this neocities or use the webspace i pay stupid money for that i dont even use lol. (4/?)
if you've ever said anything nice about my website or you still visit it, thank you. i love checking the messages on it and it makes me smile when you say ive inspired you or brought you joy. i hope that one day the internet is a happy place again. i would love to share my art with you authentically and not feel like its a competition. thank u. love u.. (5/5)
I really appreciate you saying this and I relate and feel very seen right now
As someone else who is 36, I feel this so hard! I go through long periods of being stressed about the "quality" of my site/code, too. I think your desire to just have a place to vibe online without worry about an audience, comparison or "content" is a beautiful and important feeling. It should only ever be about fun! I love your site so much, and I'd love to see anything you make, here or otherwise! :3