not sure if this is the best place to comment this but I hope you can believe me when I say I understand the headspace your in and completely sympathize with your position, for me unemployment and just being too much of a social wreck to properly apply was what I felt was holding me back, and while I wasn't nearly as "soft-locked" as you are it definitely felt that way in my head at the time, and being able to (1/?)
constantly see my peers succeed online while I was just failing over and over made me feel like I was defective or something, like we're both human beings but they seem to be capable of so much, why can't I do what they're achieving? But I think as get older and especially recently after breaking my smartphone (somewhat on purpose) (2/?)
I've come to realize that for myself I can't afford to worry about how far I'm "supposed" to be in life, I shouldn't measure my personal success off of other people's metrics, or in layman's terms I need to stop comparing my position in life to my peers, to protect my own mental peace- and I'm not telling you this as a surefire method of what to do, (3/4)
not sure if this is the best place to comment this but I hope you can believe me when I say I understand the headspace your in and completely sympathize with your position, for me unemployment and just being too much of a social wreck to properly apply was what I felt was holding me back, and while I wasn't nearly as "soft-locked" as you are it definitely felt that way in my head at the time, and being able to (1/?)
constantly see my peers succeed online while I was just failing over and over made me feel like I was defective or something, like we're both human beings but they seem to be capable of so much, why can't I do what they're achieving? But I think as get older and especially recently after breaking my smartphone (somewhat on purpose) (2/?)
I've come to realize that for myself I can't afford to worry about how far I'm "supposed" to be in life, I shouldn't measure my personal success off of other people's metrics, or in layman's terms I need to stop comparing my position in life to my peers, to protect my own mental peace- and I'm not telling you this as a surefire method of what to do, (3/4)
or by no means am I telling you *what* to do, I just hope this can offer some help or reassurance. (4/4)
you are truly so sweet and understanding thank you so much :,)