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"I have chosen to no longer be apologetic for my femaleness and my femininity. And I want to be respected in all of my femaleness because I deserve to be." β Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie
Also THANK YOU to everyone who comments on, interacts with, or even just silently reads my updates... I have been too shy to reply π₯Ίπ It's my aim to get back on NC soon-- assuming this blogpost doesn't obliterate the small web lol
If I may say this gentlyβI'm glad you found a way to be you that you're happy with! But not everyone has the same experiences; so many of my friends are genuinely happier having transitioned to the gender they identify with. Less depressed, more able to engage with the world, more comfortable expressing themselves.
You mention that it's not bad that you developed early, it's bad that boys and men harassed you over itβand the reason why trans depression and suicide rates are so high is often because of the way that society treats trans people. I think those experiences could be ones to connect over, rather than a reason to dismiss other people's experiences of gender. Just food for thought.
Dear Birdwrongs, thank you for your gentleness. But I must point out that you can enjoy all the gender nonconformity of a trans identity without believing and spreading misogynistic lies. If those friends of yours are "happier" espousing a cultlike ideology, I'd guess they're ignorant or in denial about sexism, or perhaps one of the rare Evil Women who gets off on misogyny and child abuse
Bcus that's what the trans community promotes. Once you see it, you cannot UNsee it, and that's why I keep talking about it. Maybe I didn't talk about it ENOUGH, honestly... Basically: Drop the T, just be GNC! There is nothing inferior or incorrect about being female
my friends are quite aware of sexism, in fact! none of them made their decisions about their gender based on stereotypesβI know femme trans men and butch trans women and plenty of others with unique relationships to gender. and, wellβthey all so frequently disagree on things that it's hard to think of them as a cult, ha ha.
As a cis lesbian fully happy with where I am genderwise, I've found a lot of solidarity and kinship with trans people. Of course, I don't know the people you've met, but you haven't met my friends, either, and those are some big assumptions.
It's perfectly possible to care for the rights and wellness of women while not being one or not having been born one, and seeing that in the people I know gives me hope for the world and for the way things could be. I hope you can see that hope in people, too, even if they don't relate to gender the way you do.
I've been inactive lately because life got in the way and im extremely exhausted but ill always stand by you flonne, this was beautifully written!!! love u
As usual, I had too much to say to respond with just comments. Let's all be mindful of other's feeds and, if you are also feeling wordy, link a text file or your own blog, or post a new message directly to my profile to start a new comment thread. https://vivarism.net/diary/25/mini.txt
Thanks so much for writing this. It's so important; especially sinister is how this movement is advertised to young girls. I also experimented with being NB, in retrospect I wanted to feel stronger and be released from social expectation. Realized pretending that I wasn't a girl didn't change anything and I can still be as masc as I want otherwise. I'm just glad I didn't go on T like my friends, who now regret it.