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God, this made me cry. thank you for sharing with us, it's a beautiful, bittersweet piece. I relate to those inner contradictions and struggling with what they have to say about our essence. I hope you're alright!
thank you ryo, i'm okay! i write this kind of thing to exorcise it from my mind. i'm sorry it made you cry - i hope you're okay too! and thank you again. it was my dad's birthday on monday, and i wrote him a poem where i told him i love him without using those words. so he knows, at least.
this was awful to read in the best possible way. i cant say ive done anything quite as intense but i know those conflicted feelings and urges all too well. i hope everything is okay, or that things are getting easier
@chimeramanticore thank you for reading, and i'm sorry you relate - it's tough! everything is alright and things are much easier than they were 4 years ago! i really am glad that i can talk to him again...