Man, I can relate...Several people who are very dear to me struggled with similar situations to the point that it killed them. It is not necessarily a moral failing to give into things that are addictive, as those things tend to trick the mind into continuing them. But we also have agency, even when under such pressures. "Moments of clarity."
Very insightful comments about how a person does not necessarily need to be motivated by blame / self-pity (e.g.: having "bad role models" throughout childhood, attempting to fill an inner "void" that arose from neglect/abuse, etc.). Sometimes it is simply unawareness of/indifference to immediate consequences in the short-term and/or accumulative effects in the long-term.
For example, alcohol: I feel that disinhibition to the point of regret, vomiting, blacking out, and having hangovers sucks (short-term consequences). Meanwhile, neuropathy, AFib, pancreatitis, and cirrhosis also suck (long-term accumlative effects). If I drink to be more social or to relax, then I would rather develop my social skills and take up meditation instead now that I know better.
We do not have to "learn the hard way" that the costs are probably going to be much greater than any possible benefit to us. I am still sorting through those lessons when it comes to food, but it takes on a similar pattern. Most addictions do...I am not telling you what to do or trying to guilt you into making any decision other than the ones that you actually want by saying any of this.
However, I would be remiss if I wasn't open and honest with you. In general, "tolerance" is not passively watching others self-destruct. While we all may eventually die, I will try my best to do all that I constructively can with the time that I've been given. That includes encouraging the best within those around me out of genuine care for their well-being.
Thanks for the honesty. I appreciate the concern. Very sorry to hear about the deaths you mention, that is heartbreaking. To be clear, I'm not trying to advocate for endless hedonism and self-destruction; there are lines I wouldn't cross. I am advocating for moderation; sometimes that means complete abstinence, but not always. I try and do a cost-benefit analysis.
I do find myself naturally re-adjusting as I get older, but I am just trying not to moralize it as much. For instance, I no longer smoke cigarettes, and I drink much less than I used to, simply because I've had my fill. I want to live an approximately healthy lifestyle, but I just find I am much less happy when I constantly depleting my ego and willpower. I am disciplined in some areas, but not in all.
Man, I can relate...Several people who are very dear to me struggled with similar situations to the point that it killed them. It is not necessarily a moral failing to give into things that are addictive, as those things tend to trick the mind into continuing them. But we also have agency, even when under such pressures. "Moments of clarity."
Very insightful comments about how a person does not necessarily need to be motivated by blame / self-pity (e.g.: having "bad role models" throughout childhood, attempting to fill an inner "void" that arose from neglect/abuse, etc.). Sometimes it is simply unawareness of/indifference to immediate consequences in the short-term and/or accumulative effects in the long-term.
For example, alcohol: I feel that disinhibition to the point of regret, vomiting, blacking out, and having hangovers sucks (short-term consequences). Meanwhile, neuropathy, AFib, pancreatitis, and cirrhosis also suck (long-term accumlative effects). If I drink to be more social or to relax, then I would rather develop my social skills and take up meditation instead now that I know better.
We do not have to "learn the hard way" that the costs are probably going to be much greater than any possible benefit to us. I am still sorting through those lessons when it comes to food, but it takes on a similar pattern. Most addictions do...I am not telling you what to do or trying to guilt you into making any decision other than the ones that you actually want by saying any of this.
However, I would be remiss if I wasn't open and honest with you. In general, "tolerance" is not passively watching others self-destruct. While we all may eventually die, I will try my best to do all that I constructively can with the time that I've been given. That includes encouraging the best within those around me out of genuine care for their well-being.
Cheers bro. I hope you and the family are doing well. You are not just statistics. You are people with good hearts and good minds.
Thanks for the honesty. I appreciate the concern. Very sorry to hear about the deaths you mention, that is heartbreaking. To be clear, I'm not trying to advocate for endless hedonism and self-destruction; there are lines I wouldn't cross. I am advocating for moderation; sometimes that means complete abstinence, but not always. I try and do a cost-benefit analysis.
I do find myself naturally re-adjusting as I get older, but I am just trying not to moralize it as much. For instance, I no longer smoke cigarettes, and I drink much less than I used to, simply because I've had my fill. I want to live an approximately healthy lifestyle, but I just find I am much less happy when I constantly depleting my ego and willpower. I am disciplined in some areas, but not in all.
Cheers!