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I used to be an active player from 2012 to ~2017, mostly mained Soldier and Engineer, invented a few genius tactics like the offensive pain-in-the-butt Engineer or "DA SNIPER POLICE" Soldier. Fell for a very dumb items scam and realized I actually suck at both aiming and tactical thinking which made me quit and only occasionaly download the game once in a few years to see how's it going. Fun memories!

I almost quit the game in early 2019 due to a scam where I lost all of my items, but I somehow decided to come back and grinded hard as soldier and scout. Even after 3 years of no playing, I still somehow have my rocket jumping skills down as soldier. The game unfortunately feels like more of a husk than before, but it's still a lot of fun even today, and I cherish the fun memories I also had with the game!

I can understand how guilt can be an unavoidable feeling in your situation, but please give yourself grace! there were likely many factors beyond your control. from the way you write about the circumstance, I can tell that are you aren't a reckless person. wishing you all the best in physically and mentally recovering!

I appreciate your kind words a ton :) thank you for the support