😂

the whale-lines are on point, as per usual :D

Whale Lines, do I have an idea for you! You're already doing all the hard work, the satirical writing, the sleek, minimalistic design, but what if we ... monetized it? Just imagine, $29.99 premium articles, Whale Lines merchandise, Tom Brady endorsement deal; the works!

I like the cut of your jib... just the kind of blue sky thinking we need to take the paper to the next level. We can pass it off as ironically selling out and readers will lap it up