memento mori always helps when it comes to the bigger picture -- I wish you luck in your pursuits!
試されない生は生きるに値しない -- better to live on your own terms as best you can, than to work a slow march to death. As long as one can have a simple meal and a place to sleep with water running sometimes: that's all one needs for a bountiful life. Godspeed! (reminds me of the band: https://youtu.be/7EGTD7azzWk )
畑もいいな